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This last week I have been experiencing the most intense anxiety. I haven't had this kind of hardship since he passed away.

I don't know what exactly triggered this episode but I am having trouble breathing when I think of the future.
Maybe its finals & all of my projects being due in a mere week.

I would love to just pack up & leave, forever, to the East Coast. I'm a realist & that's a joke right now. I need to finish college before I can take any extreme measures. Who wants to move with me? :)

Death Cab For Cutie's my medicine right now... I need to just breathe & relax. phew

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( 3 Screams — BOO! )
Apr. 30th, 2009 08:11 pm (UTC)
Death Cab
I've had that "I will possess your heart" song stuck in my head for like 3 weeks now.
Never payed much attention to the lyrics... just really liked the bass-line and melody... I realized a couple days ago, that it's a song about being a stalker or something.

Sweet irony:
I was completely stalking you just now.

(Not the creepy "walking by her house at 3 in the morning, and/or writing poems about her" stalking... more of a friendly "she's the only person who ever writes anything on livejournal, but I'll log-in because I wonder what my favorite 'one-time concert-buddy' is up to" stalking... hahaha)

Anyway... hope it's all good soon.

I don't really understand anxiety (because I'm completely insane, and can't make myself get overly-concerned about anything)... but I wish there was something a person could say, to put it all in perspective and help someone deal with an episode... I know a lot of people that have chronic anxiety problems, and it sucks that there's not much you can do to help.
You're smart. You already know that it's normal to get stressed-out about finals... and "being concerned about the future", is what responsible people do. So it doesn't really help to point any of that out, does it?

Oh well...
I'm better at distracting people anyway.
Come to my bar and get drunk with me, if you want to forget about it for a while.
May. 7th, 2009 10:10 pm (UTC)
lets move. after college.
May. 31st, 2009 09:50 am (UTC)
( 3 Screams — BOO! )

Latest Month

October 2010

Mystery Girl

Not a day goes by I wanna disappear

Into her eyes a mother pearl

and my head feels dead with all this useless fighting

But my heart ain't dead cause it keeps on loving

The girl hit hard like a barracuda baby

She floated on air like a crest of wave

She was a primal institution, she was a danger to herself, yeah!

Mad loving by the cold hearted

take a deep breath babe cause we just started

"Go ahead and build a better a messiah, we can dig
another grave"

This is your calling

If you are hearing this, there is nothing I can do

Something has grown out of my chest.

I have seen it.

It is hard and cold.

It has been dormant for many years.

We are trying to save you, I have come to save you.

This is what you deserve,
this is what we deserve

This is something we have brought upon ourselves.

We are not a victim, you are not a victim.

We are not a victim, you are not a victim.

God will grovel before me.

God will crawl at my feet.

And the time is this

And the time is...

When you are suffering, know that I have betrayed you...

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